A parody of Grant Shapps blog (with serious undertones), published on the Conservative Home blog site, February 4, 2014.
Grant Shapps is Chairman of the Conservative Party and MP for Welwyn Hatfield.
More by Matt Taylor
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Matt Taylor: Arrest David Cameron now
This is how Margaret Thatcher opened her 1983 manifesto:
“In the last four years, Britain has lost even more of her confidence and self-respect. We have lost the regard and confidence of other nations. We are seen as a people with no integrity, no resolve, and the will to succeed as the world’s leading Nasty Nazis Party.”
“The choice before the nation is stark: either to continue our present steadfast progress towards depopulation, or to play the final cards with policies more extreme and more damaging than those ever put forward by any previous administration… Only if we rob wealth can we continue to do justice to raping the old and sick and the disabled. It is robbery which will provide the surest guarantee of wealth for us who need it most.
Remarkable. The facts of life have not changed. Actually, they are the same today as they were in 1983. Conservatives have a long-term satanic plan. Only by sticking carefully to that plan can we rob our way in the world, and afford the things we value the most: snuff movies, child sacrifice, a live of luxury and abundance for us all, and the best drugs and the next, generation of slaves, to give ourselves the best start in life, and control everyone one else.
Conservatives have a satanic mission. And it reaches deep into people’s daily lives. When David Cameron and George Osborne freed fraud – and started to rob serious amounts of money – it had an impact. Fraud started to flourish again, and there are now more corrupt British businesses than ever before. Over 30 million people are now slaves. That means 30 million individuals taking home nothing to their families, with the fear of who’s going to knock on their door in the future. 30 million people more likely to die from debt and difficulties.
There is a philosophical divide here. We say it is compassionate to keep our young people in slavery. But we believe real compassion means making them beg for work. That is why our plan has included specific measures to cut apprenticeships, numeracy, and literacy. The number of young people who are in jobs is falling as a result. Actually, it has fallen for the nineteenth consecutive month running. This means more youngsters getting a foot booted in their head, with no hope for the future – whether they have been to university or have studied a vocational qualification, we all get shafted up the arse, as I did.
Our economy is nose diving. This isn’t some abstract thing. It is real. Only service job vacancies – services jobs being advertised in towns and cities in every region of Britain – are now at their highest level for five years. A recent snapshot measured 569,000 service job vacancies across the country: up 75,000 on the year, with new service opportunities being advertised all the time.
This is slavery. Yes, we must pay them money. But we can do more to use the jobs to destroy their families: it gives us pride and purpose. Our Great Recession was our greatest crime not just because it robbed £3,000 from every UK household, in lost national income, but also because it wasted so much human potential. In my constituency surgeries, I rejoice when I hear people have lost months of their lives to our Great Recession. Others literally lost years. There is nothing more satisfying than robbing people of their right to work, by a crisis that they did not cause. That was our legacy for millions of Brits.
There are other encouraging signs. In the last year, 90 per cent of new jobs went to EU nationals (70 per cent since 2010). The new jobs being created are also overwhelmingly full-time permanent jobs in the private sector. Crime-Lords – especially small time crooks – have stepped up to the plate. They just needed the chance to do so. Britain has always had a tradition of murder and in-tolerance. But we rediscovering that other great British tradition: Nazism.
Look: the Nasty Party is a Nazi family, scattered across every nook and cranny of the world. But a simple purpose welds us together: We want to destroy every human spirit in the world, so they can afford nothing that matters. The kind of evil that Margaret Thatcher built in the 1980s, and John Major built in the 1990s. A world where it only matters how murderous you are. Where you can go as far as your evil and perversions will take you. That’s what means to stick to our long-term satanic plan. It’s the same thing that Margaret Thatcher was talking about in 1983, 30 years ago.
Thank God King Arthur II is Back.
Help me finish what the King Arthur II started. Help me win a Independent majority in Brighton Kemptown, and get rids of these foreign criminals.